July 22 - September 3, 2023
I return to myself..
Just minding my own business..
Excavating the depths of my soul and cultivating that feeling of catharsis on paper, film and linen..
Slow living.. walks with no constraints of time, eating in no hurry at all, never waking up to an alarm (unless catching a certain plane or train..), stopping to smell every flower in bloom, hearing a song on the radio and making it my own on my nylon string guitar..
Reading and painting in public, indulging a stranger’s interest in conversation, making a conscious effort to see and hear the ones nearest to me..
Making a conscious (and various degrees of self-inflicted alternative states of “conscious”..) effort to see and hear the very nature of my self and my heart’s desires..
Every moment has since become a moment with depth and purpose, every feeling a sign on my path telling me this way or that..
Waiting for an arrival that I know will never come, better to view it as a milestone, a transient experience to enjoy before on to the next one..
Same same but different.
Here I am, I am here.
Venus retrograde
If any use,
if of any use at all..
To recount the rise & the fall
of my fragile
heart’s
pattern..
It is to note a resting point.. here..
Ici..
je suis..
Je suis ici,
Now I know how to hold
The divine curves of
My face in such a loving
way
you’d never
question the intent of it..
(Excerpt written for my first cinematic 35mm film underway)
Letting go.
I consider all the ways I give myself away..
I recall a conversation on the nature of longing..
As a longing for one’s own divine nature..
& in a certain way..
when we give ourselves away,
we risk separation from oneself..
making it terribly important, imperative even, to carefully consider the exchanges in our lives..
Give pieces to what gives peace back, to what draws you closer to, and not further from, your own divine nature..
Reclamation of the heart, mind, body and soul..
and if you find yourself in quicksand with the birds on your shoulder weighing you down.. don’t forget that the sand does dry, and the birds do fly, and the best path for you may not be where other footprints already lie..
But since that day there have been many clouds in the sky many birds in the trees and there's been a lot of salt in the sea
There also have been lots of other things
Suggested listening
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Film locations
Cheval-Blanc, France (Summer Solstice)
Newark, Delaware (Hometown)
Half Moon Bay, California (Superbloom)
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References
Georgia O’Keeffe: To See Takes Time. 9 April - 12 August 2023, The Museum of Modern Art, New York.
Hanh, Thich N. How to Love. Parallax Press, 2015.
Hiroshima mon amour. Directed by Alain Resnais and written by Marguerite Duras, Argos Films, Como Films, Daiei, Pathé Overseas Production, 1959.
hooks, bell. All About Love: New Visions. Harper Collins, 2015.
Kandinsky, Wassily. Concerning the Spiritual in Art: And Painting in Particular. G. Wittenborn, 1912.
Kandinsky, Wassily. Point and Line to Plane. Martino Fine Books, 2013.
La Femme Du Gange. Directed by Marguerite Duras, ORTF Research Department, 1974.
Lorde, Audre. When I Dare to Be Powerful. Penguin Books, 1983.
Selver, Charlotte. Every Moment Is a Moment: A Journal with Words of Charlotte Selver with an Introduction by Lee Klinger Lesser. n. p.: Sensory Awareness Foundation, 2004.